As the seasons start to change, please be mindful of any changes in your mood that may need treatment.
How to Recognize Depression:
Many people wonder how they can tell the difference between ordinary sadness- for example, after events like the loss of a loved one; losing one’s job; or a relationship breakup- and depression that needs help from a professional.
While feelings such as sadness, wanting to isolate, and feeling slowed down can be pretty normal aspects of grieving a loss, sometimes there is more going on. Wishing you were dead, having trouble concentrating or remembering things, not wanting to get up in the morning, eating less or more than usual, and problems with sleep- as well as difficulties experiencing pleasure- are all possible signs of a clinical depression.
Clinical depression does not usually go away by itself. Treatment by a professional- sometimes with medication and sometimes by simply talking with someone who is trained to treat depression- can be absolutely essential for decreasing symptoms of depression. In addition, if you are experiencing symptoms of depression- whether mild, moderate, or severe- you should not just look for treatment to take away your symptoms; the goal of treatment should be to help you get back to how you were functioning and feeling before the depression began. And of course, if you are feeling imminently suicidal, you need to seek emergency treatment. Depression can play games with your mind and you may start to lose track of all of the options in front of you. If suicide feels like your only solution, this is a sign that you need help right away.
But even milder forms of depression may need professional treatment, even if you wish that your depression will just go away on its own. Having difficulty with reaching out for help can be part of your depression as well. You might not have the energy or motivation to look for help; the thought of attending treatment may feel like too much effort; and you may feel so critical of yourself that you worry that you will be judged if you talk to someone about your symptoms of depression. It’s important to know that these resistances to seeking help can actually be a symptom of the depression itself. If friends or family members are worried about you or urging you to get help, it is probably a good idea to listen to them because their view may be less clouded than your own if you are experiencing depression.
Depression can be a sign that you are having a reaction to a loss or disappointment in your life that is bringing up feelings from past experiences- or insecurities about yourself- that are not only about the current loss. For example, if you recently lost a job, it is a normal grief reaction to feel sad, angry, and frustrated about this. However, if it also brings up feelings of failure or low self-esteem as well as global feelings of rejection or dejection, then it may be that the job loss is actually bringing some other issues to the surface for you.
Similarly, if you recently lost a relationship or experienced the death of a loved one, normal feelings of grief and loneliness may give way to feelings of anger, abandonment, helplessness/powerlessness, or guilt that may reflect feelings you have had in earlier relationships- or core beliefs that you developed about yourself in your early years. If you only focus on the current loss, you will have difficulty recognizing that your depression may be a sign of unconscious issues being stirred up- and the depression may continue to linger for a long time if you don’t address the other issues that are coming up together with it.
Another challenge with depression is that it can lead to a lot of negative cycles. For example, you feel unmotivated so you stay in bed, then you feel more depressed, so you get more unmotivated. You want to isolate because you feel worthless and critical of yourself, but then you don’t get positive feedback from others, so your sense of self-criticism intensifies. You may feel guilty or ashamed of being depressed, which only leads to more depression.
There is a way out of this negative loop, but it often requires professional help. So, if you’re experiencing depression- don’t stay stuck-the sooner you reach out for help, the less entrenched you will be in these negative cycles, and the easier it will be to pull out of the depression that has set in. I hope you will do yourself that favor if you recognize yourself in this post.
P.S. Here is a depression screen you might find helpful:
https://goldsteintherapy.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/12/DASS-21.pdf
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